Princes Hill PS Bazaar and thoughts on mothering a new toddler

Fete, fair, bazaar, call it what you will, same is same. If there are kids, rides, sausage sizzles, petting zoos, homemade cake stands, bric a brac, a jumping castle etc you know you just have to stop by and have a squiz. Well, if you're like me anyway.

After yesterdays visit again to crunchy granola-y (read: boring) Collingwood Childrens' Farm followed by a walk down Johnston Street through the South American Johnston St Street Festival this was waaay cooler and more like what a fete/fair/bazaar should be. Nothing beats the ones from our childhood though before everything got outrageously PC but still, they did well.

Little One in awe.

DOC boys serving up some much needed coffee. The first thing I headed for.

Little One "needed" an icy pole she claimed. "Need" is her knew favorite word. As in, "Mummy, I need chocolate!"

Off to the Market Stalls. The first thing that caught her eye. Now taking pride of place in the downstairs living area. $12 too! How can you go wrong?

They wouldn't let her on the big kids jumping castle so she had to settle for the "babies castle". They should have just erased this sign and written "No Fun" instead. Oh well. The bigger kids had a blast on all the cool rides though.

Next: hanging out by the stage admiring the band up close.

Desperately needed some alcoholic beverages at this point. Both mine. A sparkling and a shiraz.

Me watching the spectacle that is the Little One dancing to music. And breaking in my new sandals (from Cable.)

Dancing to Beyonce's 'Crazy in Love'.

Wheeeee! Really getting into it.

The kids loved the music.

Aaaaand over it.

Petting Zoo time.

I finally was able to catch her a bunny. She desperately wanted to pat one.

So soft, so snuggly.

Such cute ducks. She'd never seen such little cuties before.

At this point this goat was looking how I was feeling. Even after a valium, two coffees, two glasses of wine and a slice of cake.

Are they not the cutest things ever?

My random obligatory "bazaar-y" purchase for the day. A $2 cushion for the TV room. Retro.

And finally my outrageous haul of ridiculously cheap $1, $2 and .50c books. Now a holiday to read them all.

It's interesting. Before I had Little One I was excited by all the fun things I could get away with doing once I had a kid. Then I had a baby and realised that it was boring as all batshit. Taking them to the park meant a few swings on the baby swing and watching them try and figure out how to climb up a slide. Then the toddler years snuck up upon us like a creep in the night. They could master the playground pretty much by now. Awesome. Means you can hang out on the park bench and catch up on your reading. But then that next (circle of hell) descends and you suddenly have this child completely separate to you with its own thoughts, feelings and desires (other than "milk" and "sleep", its own immature irrational brain function, its own levels of tiredness, irritability, coping mechanisms, excitedness. Basically this tiny little critter trying to figure the ins and outs of the world and you, as parent, are trying to reign that in while trying to avoid the eyes of judgment cast upon you.

When people give me that look ... and you know, as a parent that look, I get tetchy and remind them "she wasn't born with an effing etiquette guide."

Today I watched and saw kids in all different states of being and heightened emotion. Jubilant, happy, grumpy, miserable, stubborn, crazy, eager to please, thoughtful. Maybe they only stayed that way for 2 or 3 minutes at most before the next wave of emotion took over, but in those 2 minutes we just assume thats how they are all the time. Good, bad, happy, sad, rude, pleasant kid.

I feel like outside the realm of a kidspace such as, say, a school fete, there is a lot of pressure on parents to tip toe with their children around the other adults so as not to disturb them. This flies completely in the face of how a toddler behaves and unless you want to see a toddler belted beyond recognition, tied up, bound and gagged, there really is no way to get them to comply beyond the lies of bribery or whatever magical pixie bullshit you can pull out your ass in that particular moment.

(Always at the line in the supermarket. Always. And you get those looks. Those looooks. Many a time I've been tempted to turn around and say "are you blind or just slow? the bucket of lollipops and chocolates are at the kid's eye level placed there on purpose, you dumb smug f***." It actually restores my belief in the fact that most humans really are pretty clueless and unintelligent.)

Anyway, my matra? For when Little One doesn't act like a child model from a Bonpoint lookbook is "it's just a phase." "It's just a phase, it will pass, it will pass, it will pass." And of course, it passes. But almost always, as is the way like some fucked law of the universe, it passes in private where she transforms from a pint sized hellion to a sweet little peach, mummy and daddy's little girl who can do no wrong. Sigh.

More booze please. Thank you.